WHEN THE GOING GETS WEIRD, THE WEIRD TURN PRO
I got me a whole new plan.
Forget SE Asia; it’s SOOO yesterday. I’m joking, of course, but Me and My Mirror can’t go there cuz we’re broke, so we’ve recast our efforts (uh-oh, I’m speaking in the 3rd person)… but no can do.
I took a job teaching English in SW Russia during the heart of yet another Russian Economic Crisis.
That’s how I roll. Anyhow, when have they NOT been in crisis? It’s how they roll.
Socialism was arguably the most costly experiment in the History of Humankind. I feel a lot of things, but it would maybe be nice to put a lit candle on socialism’s grave (a nice aromatic candle of competitive market manufacture).
And maybe the West bank of the Volga would be the best place to do dat. In terms of pure numbers, I don’t think you could argue (there’s that word!) that Stalin wasn’t the Biggest Asshole To Have EVER Walked The Planet. I mean, Hitler was like Boy George next to him. It would be nice to sit on the banks of his semi-benighted and ex-self-named city and have a sip of wodka and call him a Douchebag and give him a solid finger. Just sayin’. It’s not often I do Math, so it’s imperfect.
ROCK PAPER SCISSORS
I’m trusting my imperfect math to guide me thru shrinking sums of shrunken roubles and trusting my faulty sextant to triangulate me, and my mirrors, by turns, and by and by, thru the Crimea, Ukraine, and then ex-Yugoslavia, ie Bosnia. I fucked up but I’m not above putting lipstick on a pig. You gotta be flexible.
Bapu, our clay-footed Mahatma Ghandi, was always able to put lipstick on a pig or at least put starch in his sagging dhoti. When button-holed by a crazed fundamental Hindu and asked, ‘Just what are you?!’
Bapu calmly replied, like the sage he was: ‘Actually, I’m a Jew.’ And so they killed him.
Moving on to Eurasia:
Anyone else in the area who can show me a gaggle of unhappy phantom limbs is welcome to join the party. Watch me go. I’m pissed at my failure to arouse donor interest in my projected trip to SE Asia; I’m gonna hit this shit with a ‘watch me go’ attitude. I can’t help myself.
‘Watch me go’, is, in a lot of ways, the opposite of a mirror reflection… but mirrors are people too, and Polars Attract… and so it goes.
